


I Like Me Better When I'm With You

by i_own_your_wifi



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: F/M, ace!benji, ace!emily, demi!beca, protective beca, there's bechloe if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 03:01:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12003603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_own_your_wifi/pseuds/i_own_your_wifi
Summary: I love my ace babies





	I Like Me Better When I'm With You

Benji knew a lot of things. Benji knew magic was his calling the first time he saw a magic show when he was 5 years old. He knew he was going to be a Treblemaker when he first saw them perform. He knew that he and Jesse would be friends and that he and Bumper would never be. He knew as soon as he laid eyes on Emily Junk that she would be an important person in his life.

Their first meeting was awkward and their second was worse, but Emily laughed and her eyes lit up and Benji knew he needed to know this girl. He loitered outside Bellas rehearsal waiting for Emily to come out so he could walk her to the Bella house and show her a magic trick and make her laugh. Sometimes Beca would glare at him until he left and sometimes Amy would put him in a headlock and yell about dingo wrestling but it was worth it to see Emily rush over to him.

He knew Emily was close with her mom. He heard stories about the old Bellas traditions and Katherine Junk’s college experience. The one thing he didn’t know about Emily’s mom was what she looked like.

He waited outside of Bellas rehearsal wearing his Treblemaker’s jacket. The Trebles were having rehearsal with their performance outfits on today and he didn’t have time to go to the Treble house and change before rehearsal. There was a woman waiting as well. Benji didn’t think about it, he was busy trying to explain to Jesse why he was going to be a few minutes late. She was giving him weird looks but he ignored her. It wasn’t until Emily came out that he realized who she was.

“Benji!” Emily ran up and hugged him. “What’s with the outfit?”

“Oh, Treble’s rehearsal. Our first performance is coming up.” Benji said.

“Well, it looks nice.” Emily smiled.

“Emily?” Benji and Emily looked at the woman who was standing a few feet away.

“Mom? What are you doing here?” Emily walked over and hugged her mom. Benji fidgeted with his jacket. “You didn’t tell me you were coming to visit.”

“I wanted it to be a surprise dear, I didn’t realize you had plans.” Katherine nodded toward Benji. Benji saw the glare she sent when Emily looked away.

“Oh,” Emily looked at Benji, “Well, I mean, Benji is… we could…”

“It’s fine, I have rehearsal anyway Em, I just came to say hi.” Benji cleared his throat. “It was nice meeting you Mrs. Junk.”

Benji rushed out of the building. He didn’t know why Katherine Junk wouldn’t like him, but he suspected it had to do with the Bellas rule against “Treble-boning”. Beca took out that rule when she became captain but some of the old Bellas still believed it should be followed.

Emily called him after her mom left. She apologized for him meeting her mom like that and making him leave. He assured that it was fine, he didn’t want to keep Emily from spending time with her mom and he wasn’t lying, he did have rehearsal. Emily apologized still and invited him over to make up for it. They just listened to music in Emily’s room while Benji’s dove flew around the room after he used it in a trick.

 

He invited her over to watch Star Wars with him. She hadn’t seen any of the movies and he wanted to be with her when she saw A New Hope for the first time. Jesse complained that he wasn’t invited too because “Star Wars has the best soundtrack ever”. Benji promised to watch it with him the next day but that didn’t stop Jesse from asking Benji if he was sure he couldn’t come.

Jesse stopped Benji after Treble’s rehearsal. “Look, Benji, Emily’s great but she’s new to the franchise and we’re both fans, and you know she’ll be focused on the movie anyway, and I’ll invite Beca and it’ll be the four of us.” Jesse said.

“Jesse,” Benji said, “You’re my best friend, and I always like watching movies with you, but… I was hoping… well… I want it to just be me and Emily, alright? Do you… do you understand?” Benji looked hopefully at Jesse.

Jesse looked confused for a moment before he understood. “Oh! I get you. Don’t worry about it, I’ll be out of your hair. I’ll get the guys to do something that night so you’ll have the house to yourself.” The look Jesse was giving him made Benji feel sick but he smiled anyway and thanked him.

Benji was nervous the whole week before. He didn’t know of Emily thought it was a date or if she was thinking the same thing Jesse was. He didn’t want to ask her in case she did think it was a date and would cancel if he said it wasn’t. But he also didn’t want her to think it wasn’t a date either. He was stuck assuming the worst but hoping for the best.

He didn’t know what to wear. He didn’t want to dress too casual in case Emily dressed fancy, but he didn’t want to dress too fancy in case Emily was casual. He stared at his closet for an hour before asking Jesse for help and considering calling his mom. In the end he decided to dress in the middle. Casual enough to be watching a movie but fancy enough to look like he cared about looking nice.

He walked to the Bella house to “pick up” Emily. It wasn’t really picking up if he was just walking them around the lake to the Treble house. He knocked on the door and waited. Chloe opened it and ushered him in.

“You look nice Benji. I like your shirt, where’d you get it?” Chloe asked.

Benji looked down at his shirt. “Thanks, its Jesse’s actually.”

Chloe smiled at him. “That’s nice. Emily will be down in a minute, she’s almost ready.”

Benji nodded. They stood silently for a few moments until Beca walked into the front room from the kitchen. She glared at Benji.

“Benji.” She said.

“Hey Beca.” Benji cleared his throat. “How’s uh, how’s rehearsals going?”

“Fine.” Beca stepped closer to him. “What movie are you watching?”

“A New Hope.” Benji said. “Star Wars.”

Beca nodded. “And the other Trebles? Where will they be?”

Benji swallowed loudly. “Um… I think Jesse is taking them to a party on campus.”

“I see.” Beca took another step toward him but Chloe grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

Chloe started whispering to Beca. Benji couldn’t hear what Chloe said but he could hear Beca’s response.

“I’m just looking for out for her Chloe! I know what this is! I dated Jesse and watching a movie alone was never just watching a movie! He’s… they’re… she’s too young for that Chlo!” Beca said sharply.

Benji looked at the ground and shuffled his feet. He knew what Jesse meant when he asked him to leave their room so he and Beca could watch a movie. And he knew Beca never stayed the night because it was late. He felt sick at the thought of that happening with Emily but he couldn’t tell Beca and have her understand.

“Benji!”

Benji looked up and saw Emily coming down the stairs. He beamed at her. It seemed that she had the same thought as he did. He felt relieved that he wasn’t the only one who didn’t know what to wear.

“Ready to go?” Emily asked. Benji nodded.

“Have fun you two!” Chloe said.

“Thanks!” Emily quickly put her shoes on. Benji held the door open for her.

“Now wait a second!” Beca called after them. Benji could hear Chloe trying to stop her. “I just want to ask Benji a few questions.”

Emily sighed. “Beca, chill. I can take care of myself okay? Stop being a dick about this.”

Beca looked at Chloe then rolled her eyes. “Have her back by ten.” Beca pointed at Benji. “I will be waiting.” She stormed up the stairs.

“I’m sorry about Beca.” Emily said as they walked. She fiddled with the bottom of her shirt. “She means well, but she can get, you know.” Emily waved her hand.

“It’s okay.” Benji said. “She was looking out for you. I’m glad she cares.”

Emily smiled and bumped shoulders with him. “You’re really great Benji, I’m really glad we’re friends.”

Benji coughed. “Yeah, me too.”

Emily blushed and began rambling about her classes.

They finished the movie at midnight. They spent a while deciding on snacks and Emily kept pausing it to ask questions or tell stories the scenes reminded her of. Benji didn’t mind, he would watch all movies like that if Emily wanted.

Benji looked at Emily when the credits rolled. “So… What did you think?”

“It was good.” Emily said, “I mean, the effects weren’t like, super good and the acting was okay but I liked it.”

“Yeah,” Benji laughed, “The newer ones have better effects, but this was prime special effects at the time it was made.” Benji looked at the clock. “It’s late, I’ll walk you back.”

Emily shook her head. “No, its fine, it’s not that far.”

“I want to make sure you get home safe. It’s not a problem.” Benji insisted.

Emily pouted. “But then you’ll walk home by yourself.”

“One of us will have to and I’d rather it be me than you.”

Emily paused. “I could just stay here tonight and walk back in the morning? If that’s alright.”

Benji blinked. He was tempted to say no. Emily bit her lip and looked away and he realized Emily was as anxious as he was. “Yeah, okay.” He said. “You can stay in my room and I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“No!” Emily said. “It’s your house, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“Trust me, it’s safer for you in my room. I mean, at least I know what’s happened on that couch.” Benji laughed.

“Why don’t we both just stay in your room?” Emily asked hesitantly.

Benji paled. He could feel his anxiety rising. “Oh, um, I… well… uh, I mean…”

Emily put her hand over Benji’s. “I’ll just sleep on one side and you’ll sleep on the other, is that okay? We can make a pillow divider if that makes you more comfortable.”

Benji smiled. “Okay,” Benji picked up the snack bowl and their cups. “I’ll put these away and you can change in my room. You can borrow one of my shirts if you want.”

“Thanks.” Emily skipped upstairs.

Benji took the dishes to the kitchen and tried to process what was happening. He had a girl sleeping in his room. With him. He never had people stay over before. He didn’t know what to do. Should he offer her something? Or should he wait until she asks? He didn’t know.

He waited outside his room before he knocked to make sure Emily was ready before he came in. He knocked and waited for Emily to let him in. Emily was wearing one of his Captain America shirts and his gym shorts. He grabbed his pyjamas and headed to the bathroom to change.

“Hey, you can change in here, I have to use the bathroom anyway.” Emily said.

Benji quickly changed while Emily was in the bathroom and sat on his bed. He felt his nerves coming back. What if Emily thought this was a different kind of sleepover? He shook his head. Emily wasn’t like that.

Emily came back and settled on her side of the bed. Benji laid awkwardly on his side, trying not to take up too much space. His bed wasn’t big enough for this. Emily turned to face him.

“Goodnight Benji.” Emily whispered.

“Goodnight Emily.”

They woke up to ten missed calls from Beca and one from Chloe. They shifted in their sleep so Emily’s head was tucked into his neck. Benji didn’t know if he should move or wake Emily, luckily for him Emily’s phone rang and woke her up. Emily answered it and Benji didn’t need to guess to know it was Beca.

Benji sat up and waited while Emily reassured Beca that she was fine, she was still with Benji, and that she was only sleeping there because it was late. Benji scoffed at that. Beca wouldn’t believe that. Emily was on the phone for ten minutes. She hung up and looked sheepishly at Benji.

“I’ll make you breakfast and I’ll walk you back.” Benji said. “What would you like milady?”

Emily hummed. “Can you make me pancakes?”

“Of course I can. Would you like pancakes?” Benji asked.

“Yes!” Emily squealed. She jumped up and hugged Benji. “You’re the best!”

Benji got out the ingredients for pancakes. He thought of an idea. He picked up and egg when Emily wasn’t looking. He turned and looked at Emily and waited for her to look up. When she did she gave him a questioning look.

“Wanna see a magic trick?” Benji asked.

“Yes! What are you going to do?” Emily asked excitedly.

“Well, we need eggs to make pancakes right?” Benji asked. Emily nodded. “Eggs come from chickens but we don’t have a chicken here.”

“Oh my god, are you going to pull out a chicken?” Emily asked.

“I don’t have a chicken, but I have the next best thing: the ability to make and egg appear out of nowhere.” Benji opened his mouth and spat out an egg. Emily started laughing.

“What?” Benji asked, “Did you not like it?”

“No, no it was good, just… seriously? You just spat out an egg! I wasn’t expecting that. That was wild.” Emily said.

Benji waved his fingers in front of his face. “Good, I like being unexpected.”

Benji made the pancakes while Emily told him about the Bellas. He was glad Emily was starting to fit in with them. He knew Emily felt like an outsider before and he was glad that she doesn’t feel like that anymore.

They ate and Benji walked Emily home. They walked at a leisurely pace and Emily told him that she would tell the Bellas about his egg trick because she thinks they’ll like it. Benji ended up being late to his morning class but it was worth it.

 

Benji was working on his homework when someone knocked on his door. He looked up confused. Jesse would normally just walk in, and the other Trebles wouldn’t knock, they would just yell until he answered. His next thought went to Emily, but she normally texts before she comes over. Benji walked over and opened his door. His eyes widened when he saw Beca standing on the other side.

“Jesse should be in his room, if you’re looking for him.” Benji said.

“I’m not here for Jesse, I’m here to talk to you.” Beca said. She crossed her arms. “Can I come in?”

Benji stepped aside and let her in. “What’s up?”

Beca glanced around his room. Her gaze lingered on the photo of Benji and Emily on his desk. Benji swallowed hard.

“What are you doing with Emily?” Beca asked.

“What am I doing?” Benji asked. Beca nodded. “I don’t think I understand.”

“What are you doing with Emily? It’s not a hard question Benji.” Beca said.

“We’re hanging out. We’re friends.” Benji said.

“Just friends?” Beca said skeptically.

“Yeah, just friends.”

Beca squinted at him. “I don’t know if I believe you, so I’ll say what I came here to say. Emily is young, okay? She’s barely 18 and she doesn’t understand dating and sex and stuff. And, I know that the trebleboning rule isn’t a thing anymore but I will reinstate it if you so much as think of hurting her.” Beca paused. “And you’ll have to get a lock for your door. Chloe might not agree to hurting you but I will.”

Benji gulped. “I’m not… I don’t, um… I wouldn’t hurt her. Not on purpose. And I don’t want to have sex with her.”

“Don’t lie to me Benji.” Beca snapped. “You’re a guy and she’s a pretty girl, you’ll sleep with her if she gave you a chance.”

“I don’t…” Benji huffed in annoyance. “I don’t want to sleep with her. I don’t want to sleep with anyone. I feel sick just thinking about it, I don’t want to have sex ever and I don’t need you to tell me how I feel!” Benji said loudly. Beca took a step back. “I’m sorry.” Benji said quieter. “I shouldn’t have yelled.” Benji sat on his bed.

“No, I…” Beca joined Benji on the bed. “Do you really feel like that Benji?”

“Yeah,” Benji pulled at his blankets. “I know you probably don’t get it and think I’m weird but… I can’t hide it anymore. So you don’t need to give me the speech on consent and respecting Emily because that isn’t something I ever want to do.”

“I never said I didn’t get it.” Beca shifted uncomfortably. “I never felt like… sex was something I wanted until I met Jesse. And that was why I stayed with him for so long even when our relationship was going downhill. I thought… I thought if he made me feel like that then I have to stay with him because no one else will. I didn’t think anyone would make me feel like I wasn’t a freak.” Beca blushed. “Does Emily know?”

Benji shook his head. “I don’t know if she… thinks about me like that. And I don’t want to assume that she does if she doesn’t.”

Beca nodded. “Well, now that that’s over, I’m going to leave.” Beca stood up. Benji stood up too. Beca stopped before she left. She looked Benji in the eyes. “And by the way, this conversation never happened, okay? No one knows I came here and Chloe will yell at me if she finds out.”

Benji nodded. “I never saw you.”

Beca smiled. “Well, see you later.”

 

Jesse was flying to Denmark to watch the World’s Competition. Benji was glad Jesse and Beca were still friends and that Jesse still supported her. After what Beca told him, Benji knew Jesse was an important person in her life. Jesse surprised Benji with a ticket for himself, explaining that he didn’t want to be in a different country alone while the Bellas rehearsed and performed. He wanted a friend there and Benji admitted that it would be nice to surprise Emily.

The Bellas were busy with World’s preparation so they didn’t have time to go out sightseeing with Jesse and Benji when they got there. Beca told Jesse that the Bellas went out a little before and that there was time after Worlds was over. They didn’t mind. They knew this competition was important and that Beca and Chloe believed that the Bellas full concentration was the best way to win. They didn’t know that Beca was so stressed about Worlds that she forgot to tell the other Bellas that Jesse and Benji were coming.

Beca had given Jesse and Benji backstage passes so they could see the Bellas before they performed. Jesse had left Benji as soon as they got backstage to go see the other groups and Benji went to find Emily.

He found her standing by herself and fixing her hair. He walked over to her.

“You look nice.” Benji said.

Emily jumped and turned around. “Benji! You’re here! I can’t believe it!” Emily hugged Benji tightly. Benji could tell she was nervous and tried to reassure her.

“You’ll do great Em, I know it.” Benji said.

Emily pulled back from the hug. She looked at Benji silently for a moment before grabbing his face and kissing him. Benji made a noise of surprise and pulled back.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry.” Emily said.

Benji shook his head, he started pulling out a cloth from his mouth. Emily laughed a little at that.

“I’m sorry,” Benji said when he was done. “I expected that to take a different direction.”

“Well, I liked it.” Emily joked.

“Me too.” Benji said.

“Emily,” Beca called from behind them, “We’re almost ready to go on.” She looked at Benji, “Benji.” She smiled slightly at him.

“Good luck.” Benji said. “Hey Emily?” Emily stopped.

“What’s up?” She said.

“Would you like to go on a date when we get back?” Benji asked.

“Um, yes!” Emily smiled brightly. “This competition doesn’t matter right now, I’m already a winner tonight!”

Emily took a deep breath and hurried over to where the other Bellas were waiting. Benji started walking back to the front so he could watch but Beca stopped him. She handed him a bag. He looked in it and saw it was full of flashlights.

“Can you do me a favour?” Beca asked. Benji nodded. “You know, Emily’s song Flashlight? Well, we’re using it in our performance and I don’t have time to do this but could you pass these out to people in the audience?”

Benji nodded enthusiastically. “Of course, definitely. I’d be glad to.”

Beca sighed in relief. “Good, it was Chloe’s idea. I was against it but it is pretty cool, um you’ll know when to like take one out right? Like I can’t tell you but you’re not going to do something stupid like just take it out unnecessarily right?”

“Yeah, don’t worry.” Benji said.

“Good,” Beca said, “Okay, I gotta go.”

“Good luck.”

Beca walked over to the other Bellas. Benji walked to the front of the stage. He looked around for Jesse but couldn’t see him. Jesse said he would be wearing an American flag so Benji knew what to look for. Benji started handing out flashlights to people he passed. He didn’t know if any of them were keeping them but he promised Beca he would hand them out. He found Jesse just before the Bellas performed. He handed out the last of the flashlights and waited for the performance to start.

The Bellas walked onto the stage. Jesse was yelling “Becaw” at Beca and Benji was cheering with him. The flashlight idea worked. Almost everyone in the crowd had one and it made the performance better. Benji cheered as loud as he could when they finished. He was sure he wouldn’t be able to talk tomorrow but he didn’t care. The Bellas won, all their hard work had paid off and Benji couldn’t be prouder.

They spent the rest of the trip traveling around Denmark and hanging out with the other teams. Benji spent most of it with Emily. When they traveled with the group they walked behind the rest talking and holding hands, or leaving the hotel parties early to sit on the roof.

 

The flight back to Barden was early and Emily slept the whole time. Amy was almost kicked off the plane twice and Lily went to the bathroom and never came back but they made it back in one piece. The Bellas went back to their house to bring their trophy home and to initiate Emily. Benji and Jesse went back to the Treble house to get it ready for the new captains.

Benji and Emily agreed to go out a few days after they got back. It was a busy few days with everyone packing and preparing to leave Barden and embark on the next chapter of their lives. Benji walked to the Bella house for their date. He was taking Emily to a new restaurant off campus.

Benji fiddled with his tie as he waited for Emily. He was wearing a white dress shirt, a tie, and dress pants. Beca didn’t hate him anymore but that didn’t mean Chloe strayed too far when Beca was talking to him. Emily came down wearing a knee length blue dress. Benji smiled shyly at her. She kissed his cheek.

Dinner was good. They ate overpriced food and laughed at the other couples there. They went on a walk after dinner, their hands loosely joined between them. Emily pointed out every constellation Stacie taught her and Benji pulled a quarter from behind Emily’s ear and she kissed him when he gave it to her. They decided to hang out at the Treble house after because no one should be home. They sat on the couch and turned on a random movie. Neither one was paying attention though. They kissed some more before Emily put a hand on Benji’s chest and pushed him back.

He looked worryingly at her. “Are you okay? Is this… Are you uncomfortable?”

“No, no, it’s not that,” Emily said, “It’s just… I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. I like you Benji, I really do, it’s just that, this isn’t going to go any further than this.”

Benji sat up anxiously. “What do you mean?”

Emily put a reassuring hand on Benji’s hand. “I still want to go out with you but I don’t want to… sleep with you. Like ever. It’s just not something I want to do, like ever. I like kissing you but that’s as far as I want to go. I get it if you don’t want to go out with me anymore. I just wanted to tell you before this goes any farther.”

Benji smiled. “That’s totally okay. That’s great, honestly. I don’t want to do that either. I would be perfectly happy if we didn’t go any farther. I feel the same way. I was nervous that you wouldn’t feel the same but I guess I had nothing to worry about.”

“Really?” Emily asked.

“Yes, really.” Benji said, “I’ve been doing some research, and I found the word asexual. I never really thought that it would be something like that, I thought I was the only one but… I talked to Beca about it and I got to thinking that maybe it wasn’t something wrong with me, you know?”

Emily nodded enthusiastically. “It seemed like some weird thing with me and like no one would ever get it or feel the same so I tried to find a way to fix it but instead I found a community online telling me I wasn’t broken or alone.” Emily paused, “Wait, did you say you talked to Beca about it?”

Benji blushed. “She came to see me a while ago. She was telling me that you were too young for sex and if that’s what we were doing then she was going to hurt me if I hurt you. I got a little upset because she didn’t believe me that we weren’t doing that and I told her that I never wanted to have sex ever and she told me she understood because she… well, I shouldn’t tell you what she said, you’ll have to ask her. But you can talk to her about this stuff, she’s pretty understanding.”

Emily laughed. “She came by to give you the ‘you hurt her I hurt you speech’ and you end up closer to her and finding out something she hasn’t told anyone, good for you Benji.”

Benji laughed. They laughed about it for a minute before cuddling and trying to catch up on the movie. They never did catch up on the movie. Benji was too focused on Emily’s hand drawing patterns on his and Emily was focusing on staying awake. She was still a little jetlagged. Benji noticed her yawning and offered to walk her home. She was too tired to argue and let him. They kissed goodbye at the door and Emily watched Benji walked down the path until he was out of sight.

The Bellas were waiting up with questions and Emily waved them off. She told them that they had fun and that was all they needed to know. Emily did make a note to herself to talk to Beca later about what Benji told her.

Emily woke up late the next day. She didn’t realize how tired she was until then. She went down to the kitchen. Stacie, Chloe, and Beca were in the kitchen already. Emily waved at them and made herself a peanut butter sandwich. When she looked at the other girls Stacie was looking at her expectantly.

“What?” She asked.

“You went on a date last night Em, and,” Stacie smirked, “New things happened and it’s okay to have questions, and who better to ask then me or Chloe? The resident house sex experts.”

Emily choked on her sandwich. “What? That’s… we didn’t… it’s none of your business Stacie!” Emily sputtered.

Stacie chuckled. “Emily, sweet, sweet Emily, you know you can talk to us about things. New feelings, new experiences, we’re more than happy to guide you through this confusing period in your life.”

Emily shook her head. “That’s unnecessary Stace, but thanks, I think? Um, but actually I was wondering if I could talk to Beca actually.”

The three girls looked at Emily, shocked. Chloe glanced between Beca and Emily trying to figure out what was going on. Stacie stood slack jawed at Emily’s request and Beca froze, her spoonful of cereal halfway to her mouth.

“You want to talk to Beca? About… Benji?” Chloe asked.

“Yeah, if that’s okay with Beca, obviously. ’Cause I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, Beca, I just have some questions and Benji told me that you’re good at… this stuff.” Emily rubbed the back of her neck uncomfortably. Emily saw the look of realization in Beca’s eyes.

“Oh.” Beca said. “I see. Um, let me finish my cereal first and then we can talk?”

Emily nodded. “Yeah, definitely, of course. Thank you so much Beca, you’re like the best captain ever. Although Chloe’s good too, like I’m not saying she isn’t, just you’re both good, obviously.”

Stacie felt Emily’s forehead. “Nope.” She said. “No fever. The only other possibility is Benji brainwashed her into thinking that Beca can talk about stuff.”

“Shut up Stacie.” Beca said. “Leave her alone, Jesus dude.”

Stacie raised her hands in surrender. “Sorry Cap.”

“Meet me in the loft Emily. Amy’s with Bumper right now so it’s empty.” Beca said.

“Okay dokay.” Emily said. She walked to the loft and sat on Beca’s bed. Beca came up a few minutes later and sat with Emily. She didn’t say anything at first. Finally Beca cleared her throat.

“So, uh, I’m assuming Benji told you?” Beca said.

“Oh, no he didn’t tell me what you told him, just that he talked you about like… the sex thing and that you understood and were… good at understanding.” Emily said.

Beca nodded. “Do you, ah, do you feel the same way as Benji?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“Good. He’s a nice kid, I’m sorry I acted weird around him before. I was just… trying to protect you.” Beca blushed.

“Do you… mind telling me what you told Benji?” Emily asked hesitantly. “It’s okay if you don’t want to, I won’t pry.”

Beca paused. “I guess.” She took a deep breath, “When I was in high school, everyone was talking about what boy or girl they liked or what celebrities were hot and I never felt that, like I never had crushes on people and in health class the teacher said we’d feel… urges and I never did. I thought there was something wrong with me, so I had sex with people anyway just to try and fix it and feel normal. It didn’t work. It made me feel worse, like I was more broken.” Beca began tearing up, “I told myself that I didn’t need a relationship if I didn’t feel anything physical toward anybody. And then I met Jesse, and everything clicked. I wanted to be with him. Not at first, but after a while I started to feel like I wanted to do that with him. But, only with him. And I did and it was great. I finally felt normal. I didn’t want to break up with him because I didn’t think I could feel like that with anyone else.” Beca wiped her eyes. “I had to realize I wasn’t weird or broken just because of how I felt. Things with Jesse were good because they were safe, and I realized that I loved him but we weren’t going to last. I need to find someone else who I can feel like that with and I want to be with them because I want to, not because I feel like I don’t have another choice.”

Emily put her hand on Beca’s shoulder. “I felt like that too,” Emily said, “I mean, I never had sex with anybody but I felt like I was supposed to. And my parents kept telling me about boys and girls and how it was okay to… experiment in college and I never wanted to do that but they never understood when I told them. No one’s ever understood until Benji. And now you.”

Beca nodded. “I’m like, here for you dude, if you wanna like, talk about stuff. I know you have Benji but I wanna give you the option.”

“Thanks Beca, that means a lot.” Emily said.

“Right,” Beca coughed, “Now get your cute butt outta here and go do something. Stacie is dying to hear about your date, like literally dying.”

Emily giggled. “I’ll go talk to her. But I don’t think she’s literally dying.”

Beca rolled her eyes. “Whatever dude, just leave.”

 

The summer was hard. Benji went home to California and Emily stayed in Atlanta. They called and skyped as often as they could but it wasn’t enough. Benji hated not being there with Emily. He wished he could hold her and kiss her and tell her how much he loved her. He wished he could see her all the time. He knew he couldn’t do that when he was away. He knew what he needed to do.

After buying a used car and saying a tearful goodbye to his parents he was off. It took him a week of driving, a few days to find an apartment, and a few days to move in. He looked at his new home and smiled. It was small but it was his, and it was closer to Emily. He skyped her as soon as he was settled.

“Hey Benji!” Emily smiled at him through the screen.

“Hey Em. What are you doing right now?” He asked.

“Right now?” Emily asked. Benji nodded. “Not much, my parents are at work so I’m just hanging out until they get back.”

Benji grinned, “Well, how about you come over?”

Emily laughed. She shook her head. “Benji, you do realize that I’m in Atlanta and you’re in California right?”

“Well,” Benji smirked, “What if I wasn’t in California and I’m actually in Atlanta in my brand new apartment?”

“What?” Emily squealed. “You’re here?”

Benji laughed. “I’m here. I hated being away from you so I decided to fix that.”

“Oh my stars! I can’t believe this!” Emily covered her face. “I’m coming over right now!”

“That’s what I was hoping.” Benji said. “I’ll text you the address.”

Benji waited anxiously while Emily headed over. He knew the move was a spontaneous decision and he wasn’t sure how Emily would react. He knew he should have talked to Emily about it but it was too late now. He didn’t know if Emily would want to move in with him. He knew she had the Bella house but she would be the only one living there this year. Freshmen lived in the dorms and everyone else had already made living arrangements by the time auditions were over.

Benji jumped when there was a knock on the door. He quickly opened the door and Emily flung her arms around him. He hugged her back and squeezed her tight.

“Hey baby,” Benji said, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too!” Emily pulled back. “I can’t believe you’re really here.”

Benji leaned in and kissed her. “I’m really here. Come on, I’ll show you around.”

Emily liked the apartment. She agreed with Benji that it was small but she could see them living there. She told Benji that she wanted to live with him but needed to be at the Bella house with the new Bellas. Benji told her it was fine, he understood. He just wanted to be closer to her. They ordered a pizza for dinner and ate it on the couch while watching stuff on Netflix. Emily yawned and leaned her head on Benji’s shoulder.

“I love you.” Emily mumbled. Benji kissed her head.

“I love you too.” Benji whispered.

Benji knew a lot of things. He knew he made the right choice moving to Atlanta. He knew the Bellas would be great this year. He knew he wasn’t weird or broken and that he was the happiest he had ever been. But most importantly, he knew Emily Junk was the most important person in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from I Like Me Better by Lauv
> 
> Find me on tumblr @i-own-your-wifi


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